Sam, Dean and Cas the baby angel - The life of the Winchesters
by Nyxteria
Summary: This is a revamp of my first fanfic, it's based on an AU in which Mary lives, John still dun fucks up as a father and Cas is there for Dean from the start. Come with me and embark on a journey with the Winchesters, find out how they got into hunting, explore their friendships and adventures first hand. After all, you're not afraid of the Supernatural, are you?
1. Chapter 1

My brother was only six when he first began suffering from night terrors, the only thing doctors could think of was to get him a teddy bear and a night light and that he'll be fine. The thing is he wasn't a baby, he was smart and knew way more than he should've. The little smartass. At the time even my parents had the suspicion that they were caused by stress from external stimuli-for he was a normal happy child, though everything changed when he went to sleep.

At the time I didn't pay attention to how much parents felt about the whole ordeal, they were always calm and collected except for the whispers I could hear through the wall at night, they were terrified. It's almost as if they _knew_ what was up. Their baby was ridden with an illness neither they or any doctor could understand. After a few months he stopped sleeping during the night, completely convinced what he saw was real, he was only able to sleep for a few hours during the day in random rooms around the house, except his.

A few weeks passed and he was ready to try sleeping in his room again, so he did. Once again the dreams started and they were always the same, a little girl stood at the foot of his bed, getting closer, closer, closer, until he woke up screaming then went back to sleep so the vicious cycle could repeat itself, after a few times he'd go to our parents room and stay with them for the rest of the night until one night he came into my room rubbing his tired blue eyes. "It's not fair that I keep waking them up, can you stay in my room with me?" And so I did.

I waited for him to fall asleep and after about ten minutes he began to whimper "Go...Go..." He shot up, his eyes fixated at the foot of his bed, his neck snapped in my direction and he lunged at me. He pushed me with a force that no eight year old possessed on his own, then he collapsed. I crawled towards him to make sure he was okay, but at this point our parents were awake from the noise. He sat up, his hair matted with sweat, his skin was sickly pale; almost yellow looking. Then of course he puked, then burst into tears. "Why didn't you go...I told you to go, Dean...She was going to get you...She couldn't get inside me...So she went for you...Your ear..."

By this point our parents came in and took him to the bathroom to clean up, I was slowly processing what he said, so I hesitantly reached for my ear, it was bleeding from the inside. I put my finger inside my ear to feel what felt like mush really, the worst thing is what I pulled out. The tip of a child's finger, ridden with whatever things attach themselves to you when you decompose.

We boarded up the room and eventually moved, but that wasn't the last time something supernatural happened to Sammy.

Sammy crawled into my bed as soon as the shouting started, something about what happened that night a few weeks ago changed the way things were around the house, dad developed a sudden obsession in teaching us how to shoot a gun, mum seemed reluctant but allowed it. Sammy was smart enough to know something was going on and so was I. It's not the first time we had moved and it sure as hell wasn't the first time something _odd _had happened. Our normally quiet and contained parents just seemed to lose it, all they did was scream at each other lately. I wish I could figure out what they were talking about. So as I sat there with Sammy on my lap, I cupped his ears and listened.

"No John, you fucked up this time and you know it." It was the first time I'd heard my mum swear.

"Really Mary? _I _fucked up? I did this for _you_, so that our boys could grow up safe!"

"I didn't want you to! You've endangered the boys, I didn't want them to have this life!"

"They don't need to be like us, I've already told you this."

"How do you expect them to protect themselves, John? By ignoring reality and running away? You were selfish for doing what you did. You should've left me."

_This doesn't make any sense _I thought, but boy I was determined to find out. The next thing I heard was the slamming of a door, dad probably went to the bar. Again. I thought about everything that had happened up to this point. Is it stupid that I believe in ghosts? Probably. All I know is that now I have only one priority, and that was to protect my little brother from whatever it is that's plaguing this family.

I gently uncupped Sammy's ears and ruffled his hair. "Time for bed Sammy." I said through a slightly forced smile. I picked him up hulk style and tucked him into bed.

"Hey Beanbag." Sammy whispered, I smiled at the little pet name. He hadn't used it since he was three.

"Yeah Sammy?"

"Sing me a song, you know, like you did when I was a baby."

And so I did.

_Carry on my wayward son, there'll be peace when you are done_

_lay your weary head to rest, don't you cry no more…_

It was around 4am, Sammy was asleep, mum was asleep, dad was passed out on the couch stinking of alcohol.

I swear to God if I could go back and stop myself from doing what I did that night I would. I mustered all the courage I could and tiptoed to dad's study.

The creaky hardwood floor made my heart jump into my throat, yet I kept going. I walked past the couch with dad snoring on it and straight to the door of his study. It was locked. Luckily for me, I was a survivalist of sorts and managed to pick the small brass lock. The door creaked open and I walked in. The room was small and cramped, the walls were barely visible, covered in weird blueprint and symbols, there were books stacked to the ceiling, written in languages that didn't even seem _human, _the room had a musky kind of smell, dust clinged to the air_._ There was a pentagram kind of symbol painted in front of the door, my suspicions of something Supernatural taking place seemed way more logical now.

The one thing that stood out the most about the room was an ancient looking stone box sitting on the desk, it was engraved with one of those weird looking languages. It had a kind of lingering luminescence, it called to me. I was in some kind of trance-I edged towards it, reached out and flipped the box open. The light faded and nothing seemed to happen for a few seconds until a buzzing sound filled my ears, the room started to shake and a shadow filled the room with darkness and the smell of sulphur.

"Hello Dean." Man, this guy was creepy. He had these pure black eyes, like coal. I could tell we weren't going to get along, anyone who can make the word 'hello' sound sarcastic was almost always bad news.

"Who the hell are you?" I asked suspiciously while taking a step back.

"Yes." He replied.

I narrowed my eyes at him. "You're not human are you?"

"Bingo. Demon. Crowley. Thank you for releasing the king of hell, adios."

He clicked his fingers and disappeared. Everything happened so fast, I stood there in a daze, trying to process what just happened.

_Demons, Crowley, box, demons? British. What?_

I sat down on the floor, it hadn't sunk in yet. All I knew was that Sammy needed protection from much more than bickering parents. _Much more._

Before I had time to react the front door was kicked down by a group of men-no, not men; they had Crowley's black eyes. The next thing I saw didn't make sense, my dad was fighting them, like full on ninja-style knifing the bastards.

Mid combat he called to me. "Dean, take Sam and run. GO!"

So that's what I did. I ran upstairs, grabbed Sammy and the bag of provisions I've kept under my bed since we moved house. I could hear my mum shouting at the things at the door, she was fighting too by this point, I ran downstairs and almost slipped in a pool of blood, dad was the source of it. I ran even faster to the back door, burying Sammy's head into my chest, I didn't want him to see all the blood.

I ran and ran until I was nauseous and drenched in sweat, we were far away enough to take a minute to gather ourselves.

I opened the bag and took out some fresh clothes for Sam and helped him change. _Okay so Dad's dead_. I thought to myself. Then I realized.

Dad was dead.

I snapped out of it quickly enough, I had to protect Sammy, my feelings were irrelevant compared to his.

"Dean?" Sam asked me rubbing the sleep out of his eyes.

"Yeah Sammy?" I replied with soft tone, too soft actually-so he knew something had gone bad.

"Are we going to Uncle Bobby's?" He asked. That's where we always went when something weird happened.

My genius little brother figured out our next move, at this point I wasn't sure how much he saw or how much he knew, but he'd figure it out eventually, he was a smart kid. Luckily for us Bobby didn't live too far away, maybe about an hour on foot. His wife Karen always baked us pie. No matter what time we turned up.

I reached into the bag and pulled out handgun, courtesy of dad of course. I tucked it into the back of my jeans discreetly so Sammy didn't see; I wasn't prepared to kill anything though. If a demon came along I doubted I could shoot, after all it wouldn't kill the demon-just it's meat suit.

I took Sammy by the hand and we started walking, the atmosphere was weird though. There was a kind of ambient light lingering in the air. I thought nothing of it and glanced over to Sammy, I could tell his cogs were turning furiously. We walked for about twenty minutes in silence until something crashed into the ground behind us and exploded in a blinding white light.

I pushed Sammy behind me and reached for the gun, I didn't need it though-for what we saw next was borderline comical.

A boy with scruffy brown hair and huge angelic looking blue eyes stood up covered in soot. He was wearing this oversized trench coat, the boy looked round in a daze until he saw me, giggled and skipped towards me.

"HI DEAN!" He called through huge smile.

"Uhh, hi..." I replied.

"I'm sorry! I should introduce myself! I'm Castiel!"

"Okay...So, what exactly are you?"

"I'm an angel, only a baby though." He said sadly.

"An angel? Nope. No, we're not doing this crap again, come on Sammy let's go."

"But...I was assigned to be your guardian angel..." I glanced back at him and felt a pang of guilt, his big blue eyes looked on the verge of tears, his trench coat was all floppy-like around his hands.

"Fine. Come with us, we'll deal with this later."


	2. Chapter 2

I grabbed Sammy's hand, turned my back to Castiel and briskly walked away, I really wasn't liking the idea of another Supernatural encounter. Cas started running, trying to keep up, but tripped over his stupid coat. Part of me wanted to help him up but I kept walking, maybe if I kept walking he'd give up. Instead he scrambled to his feet, grinning like an imbecile.

"Dean! Hey Dean!" He called. "Stop running! I can teleport you!"

"No tha-"

And just like that we appeared in Bobby's living room. Bobby was stood there, mouth gaping open, beer bottle in hand.

"Knocking doesn't cost much." He said through a smile. He hoisted up Sam and gave him a hug. "So what brings you boys to Uncle Bobby? "

"The baby angel." Sam said matter-of-factly.

"Baby angel?" Bobby asked suspiciously. I diverted my gaze, Bobby understood something was wrong and lifted Sam to his eye-level. "Hey Sammy, I want you to do me a favour! Go to the kitchen and tell Aunty Karen that I want a nice big blueberry pie, okay?"

Sam scurried off to the kitchen, leaving Bobby and I alone. I remembered all the other times mum or dad dropped us off here. "Go help Aunty Karen with the pie." Bobby would always tell us. I guess it was some kind of code to them.

"So...What happened?" Bobby asked cautiously.

I opened my mouth to speak, but a horrible squeaking sound came out instead, before I knew It I burst into tears. "He's dead Bobby..."

Bobby wrapped his arms around me instinctively, come to think of it, I'd only ever cried around him. If I cried around dad he'd just give me this disgusted look and tell me to be a man. I remembered all the bad things that happened before Sammy was born. The strange men, the monsters. I never mentioned it to anyone because they all treated the situations like something normal. I always cried though, but only when I was with Bobby. He'd always say the same thing.

"It's okay to cry, boy. Just talk to me when you're ready."

So that's what I did, I calmed down enough to explain everything, from my parents argument, to the box with the english demon, to the men with black eyes. I told him how the last thing I saw was my dad, laying dead on the floor and my mum fighting the men with tears in her eyes.

"And the angel Sam mentioned?" He asked.

"Castiel..." I began to explain but a crashing sound cut me off.

"HI DEAN!" Shouted Cas from the pile of books he crashed into. He got up and stumbled to my side, smiling wide like he'd achieved something.

"Oh." Said Bobby. "He's a baby."

"Yep!" Cas replied.

"Meatsuit?" Bobby asked.

"Nope, just me!" He replied.

"Am I missing something here?"

"He's a newborn angel."

I looked at him blankly and blinked.

"Dean, he's an angel. Normally angels possess people like demons do, except they ask permission. Castiel being a newborn means that he's in his original body, the body that was assigned to him." He glanced over at Cas who was bouncing on the couch. "He's all that's in that body."

"Okay but hold up. I've always known about ghosts, demons even, but angels? What else is no one telling me?" I asked.

"Look Dean, we tried-your parents and I, we didn't want you to live a life like this." Bobby looked desperate, but I stood my ground.

"Bobby. What. Aren't. You. Telling. Me."

"I'll explain everything, but first I need to make sure your mother is okay."

Bobby told me to help Sam and Karen in the kitchen while he went looking for mum, after about an hour he returned with her. She looked shaken, but composed. Her eyes were puffy and her blonde hair was matted with blood, I took Sam away before he noticed her, no one should see their mother look so shaken. I took him outside and sat him on Bobby's rusty swingset. I began pushing him gently while chatting to him about everything and anything-until he stopped me.

"I saw the blood." Sam said wide eyed. I was stunned, I couldn't think of the right thing to reply with, so I didn't.

"Daddy was hurt wasn't he?" He said, while furrowing his eyebrows.

"Yeah Sammy, he was..." I replied trying to hold back tears. He nodded, then went back to thinking, he was thinking so hard I could almost see steam coming out his ears.

"Those men weren't people were they?" He asked.

"No Sammy." I replied, my voice sounded strained. Sam stopped asking questions, I think he could hear the weakness in my voice.

After about half an hour, Bobby called us in. Mum had cleaned up and was sitting on the couch with Karen holding her hand. She sat me down next to her and propped Sam onto her lap. She told us that dad didn't make it, she told us what those things were, and she told us the truth. She explained how everything in the scary stories are real, and how it was her and dad's job to keep them away. Nobody cried. Instead we sat there in stunned silence, I could see Sam thinking. Eventually he broke the silence.

"Is daddy in heaven now?"

Mum took a sharp breath and placed Sam on my lap. "You boys are going to stay with Bobby for a while, I have some things I need to sort out." Completely avoiding the question.

I nodded and took Sam to our usual room. I was angry. Everything made sense now at least, but I was angry. Our dad just died and she doesn't want to stick around. Fine, just fine.

I opened the door to see Cas sitting cross legged on the floor, playing with a handgun. Soon as he saw me he got up and patted my head.

"The hell was that?" I asked more angrily than intended.

He looked so devastated. "I...I was trying to make you feel better." He said, a little tear dripping down his cheek. "I'm sorry I thought that's what humans did." His tears came down furiously.

I felt a pang of guilt spread across my chest.

"Hey...It's okay I'm not angry." I said with a soft, hopefully comforting tone.

"You're not?" He asked wide eyed.

"Of course not. Come here, let me show you what humans do to make each other feel better."

He took a step forward and I hugged him, he got the jist of it eventually and hugged back. Then Sammy canonballed into us and we hugged him too, and you know what? I felt happy.


	3. Chapter 3

Two months had passed and mum hadn't even called. I was getting angrier and angrier by the day, not necessarily because she didn't call, but because I'd ran out of things to say to Sam.

"Is mummy okay?"

"I don't know Sammy."

"Is mummy coming back?"

"I don't know Sammy."

I noticed a difference in Sammy too. Not once did I see him cry, not once did he fall asleep before I did. He was always either reading Bobby's books or writing. If not doing that he was staring blankly into space. This made Cas cry, so many hugs ensued. It was hard to believe that he was only six.

A lot of things had happened in those two months, disturbing things...Karen got possessed by a demon, so Bobby and I tied her up in the basement. We tried everything we could to get the demon to leave, but she didn't. Not until Karen died of starvation. It was disgusting how much torture the demon was willing to take just for the fun of watching Bobby break. We gave her a hunter's funeral. Cas cried more than anyone-he felt responsible.

"Other angels can fix these things." He cried and cried and it hurt to watch, I got fond of the little guy-I say little guy but he looked my age. Every time Bobby felt sad, Cas would know and he'd appear, give him a hug then go again. Not once did he take of his trench coat, so I asked him about it. His blue eyes lit up when I did. So he told me the story.

"I'm still a baby by angel standards." He giggled. "So when I was told to find you using a blood spell I accidentally turned up at a house in Wisconsin, there was a hunter there with your last name! Blood spells are supposed to take you to the person you're looking for, but I got it a little bit wrong and went to a person with your last name instead." He furrowed his eyebrows and his eyes got watery again. "I'm sorry I messed up Dean...Can I hug you to make you feel better?"

I laughed. "I'm not mad Cas, but alright." And so we hugged, and he continued to tell the story.

"The boy there was nice, he didn't try to stab me with the pointy things you hunters carry." He giggled again. "He let me in because it was raining and gave me the coat to warm up. He said it was his dads but he didn't want it anymore, so he let me keep it, isn't that cool!" He grinned and flopped his hands so that the sleeves of his coat jumped up and down. "You and him have so much in common, his dad's name is John too!" He announced proudly. At this point I was seeing a connection.

"Cas...Was he by any chance related to me?" I asked.

Cas' eyes widened and he began to hyperventilate. "I'm so sorry Dean, I shouldn't have brought it up, I only just figured out how blood spells work, they send you to family members, not people with the same last name, I'm so sorry Dean, I'm sorry." Tears spilled out of his eyes savagely, he kept repeating himself. "I'm sorry Dean, I'm sorry."

I felt my eyes brim with tears, he always felt like he failed me for some reason, so like clockwork, I took him in my arms and hugged him

"I'm not mad Cas...If you knew you would've told me. You're the best angel buddy ever, I promise."

Cas sniffed and wiped his eyes. He smiled, took my hands and jumped up and down. "I'm Dean's favourite angel buddy!" He beamed.

As if on cue, we were interrupted by a crash and a flash of light. I looked over to see a boy with floppy brown hair and puppy-like brown eyes halfway stuck in the windshield of Bobby's truck.

"I'm okay!" He called and wriggled himself out of the broken car, he was wearing an oversized leather jacket. That brought one thought to my head.

Baby angel.

"Gabriel?!" Cas asked excitedly.

"CAS! It's me!" Gabriel ran over to Cas and tackle hugged him, they fell on the ground in a weird struggle of affection. This is the only time I'll ever say it, but the scene was so cute I could've died in a puddle of cuteness induced puke. Cas and Gabriel got up arm in arm, both smiling wide.

"We were born on the same day! He's one of the messenger babys." Cas giggled. "That means he has a message for us!"

Gabriel moved his floppy hair out of his eyes. "I came to tell you to take Sam and Dean somewhere else, it's not safe here anymore, I'm sorry to burden you, Cas." His puppy eyes widened as if he expected a telling off. Cas pulled him into his arms.

"It's okay Gabey, it's not your fault. "

Gabriel wiped his eyes. "I have to go now Cas, but angel radio me once you're safe, okay?"

"Okay Gabriel, I'll see you very soon." And with that, Gabriel vanished.

I chuckled and we went inside to find Bobby passed out on the couch again, he'd been getting drunk a lot lately. Cas' lower lip trembled when he saw Bobby laying there. "He's sad again." Cas whimpered. "I don't want to wake him up because he'll drink again and hurt himself more." He glanced over at me, so I assured him everything was fine and Bobby will be okay soon. I couldn't help but feel I was lying. I knew we were starting to burden Bobby even though he would never admit it, even when drunk. So in that moment I made a snap decision and left Bobby a note.

_Cas is taking Sam and I somewhere safe, don't worry about us, we'll be in touch -Dean_

I asked Cas if he could take us to this brother of mine in Wisconsin. It didn't even surprise me that he existed to be honest. The amount of things that had happened made having a brother that I didn't know about seem like a holiday. Cas said he would take us, but first I needed to tell Sam.

I walked into our room, Cas by my side to find Sam scribbling down into a notebook. He was a little genius, could write better than me at the age of six. "What you up to Sammy?" I asked with a smile.

"Writing." He replied without looking up.

"About what?" I asked, still smiling.

"Aunty Karen." He said, still not looking up. My smile faded.

"Why would you do that?" I demanded.

"Because I'm not a baby. I have ears you know. I know what happened to her, I know what that _thing_ did. I'm making sure we remember for next time."

I felt a mixture of uneasiness and surprise, I glanced at Cas, his lower lip quivering again.

"What do you mean by next time?" I asked.

This time he looked up from the book. "There's always a next time."


	4. Chapter 4

Cas teleported us about a days walk away from our brother, then he started sniffling and apologising because his powers weren't as good as a 'big angel's.' And on cue, I hugged him and told him it was alright. Cas had spent a lot of time talking and playing games with Sammy, I was worried to say the least.

He hadn't cried, not once. He grew sort of distant, in that orphaned six year old kind of way, I can't really describe it, but it was like he grew wise overnight. He wouldn't talk to anybody unless they talked to him, hence why Cas was trying so hard. I must admit I felt kind of useless, from the moment Sammy was born I felt this kind of obligation to him-no matter what happened to me, I'd make sure he'd grow up okay. All this supernatural stuff had been happening for as long as I could remember and the last thing I wanted was for him to become the centre of it, now that he was, it seemed to not even bother him. It was like he didn't even need me.

That's when he finally spoke.

"Dean?" He asked rubbing his eyes.

"Yeah Sammy?"

"My legs hurt..." He said, looking at me intently.

I smiled at his stubbornness, he was never one to give in and straight up ask for help, I guess he got that from me. I took off my jacket and wrapped it round his shoulders, hoisted him up onto my waist and carried on walking. He was asleep within minutes. Cas and I walked through the night, and finally, hungry and exhausted, we arrived at this run down looking house in the middle of a field. It was painted blue, a long time ago though. It was faded in patches and peeling off in others, the windows were boarded up and there were symbols and runes painted all over the place. It looked like a kind of knock off Scooby-Doo trap.

"So do we knock or..?" I asked Cas.

"Yeah, but it's a secret knock, only I know it." he said with a smug look. I couldn't help feeling a little proud of him. He went up to the faded blue door, you could see through the dirty glass that it was boarded up from the inside, at this point Sam was waking up and he was grumpy. Sam being the Sam he was before his morning coffee and cigarette, wriggled out of my arms and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes.

"You gonna knock then or what?" He asked Cas in a monotonal, tired voice. Cas took out a long, slender silver knife and slit his forearm, he dabbed at the blood with his finger and painted a rune on the door, and with that we were teleported inside.

"Damn Cas, that was metal." I remarked.

"You lied to everyone Cas, that wasn't a knock!" Cried Sammy, I would love to say that he grew out of being a smartass, but he didn't.

Something was off about this place, there was a faint smell of sulphur lingering in the air. I Instinctively pushed Sam behind me, and Cas instinctively held my wrist and stood slightly in front of me. He was good at this whole guardian angel thing, and I have to admit, him holding my wrist gave me a sense of security. It wasn't just me and Sammy anymore. I was grateful for that. The room we were in was surprisingly welcoming compared to the outside, the oakwood floor was clean and all rough looking, the staircase had a blue carpet, kind of faded but still nice to look at. The walls were wood too, the house had the whole cabin in the woods look going on, except cabins in the woods didn't have runes and symbols painted all over the place. At least I didn't think so.

Cas called out.

"Adam?"

I remember feeling a rush of excitement, I had another brother! And now I knew his name, even though I was a little apprehensive, I shivered with excitement just at the thought of having an actual family again.

"Castiel? Is that you?" Called back a tentative voice.

"Oh Adam it's you! I promised I'd come back with them!"

Adam's voice flickered with excitement. "I'll be right up!" We heard the sound of rushed footsteps from below us, before we knew it, a tall blond boy rushed out of the door under the stairs. He pulled all three of us in a bear hug. After about ten seconds he cupped my face.

"You look so much like dad, Dean." He had blue eyes, kind of like Sam's, which lit up when he smiled. He was surprisingly soft spoken compared, to the rest of my father's spawn.

"And you must be Sammy!" He said, lifting Sam above his head, then cuddling him like an oversized teddy bear. I mean, don't get me wrong I have nothing against the guy, but something in my mind clicked when he called my baby brother Sammy. Only I call him Sammy I thought to myself, I guess it didn't come to mind that he wouldn't be only my little brother anymore. I quickly shook myself out of it though, my anger was replaced by relief that we actually had another family member hanging around. He lead us into the living room where there was a fireplace, a bunch of bedrolls, a radio, a small TV and a bunch of assorted weapons. We all sat down, Adam grinning at us like we were the best thing in the world. He definitely passed the Winchester test, he looked like a mixture of Sam and I, except he was blond and much paler. He had some of dad's rugged handsomeness with his unkempt hair and wild sparkle in his eyes, but his soft jaw line and seemingly permanent little smile begged to differ.

"Oh!" Cried Cas. "I almost forgot! I need to angel radio Gabriel!"

"You guys might wanna stand back." Both Adam and I said simultaneously. Our eyes locked and we shared a chuckle.

We watched Cas' face crinkle up as he concentrated, after around thirty seconds of face squishing we heard the usual crash, we turned around to see Gabriel sprawled at the foot of the stairs.

"I'm okay!" He called, dusting himself off. Cas jumped up excitedly.

"Yay Gabriel came!"

"CAS!" Gabriel called, pulling him into a hug. We all laughed at the familiar sight. Gabriel then came round and hugged us all individually, except Adam, he pretty much jumped on Adam.

"Hey kiddo, got any messages from the big guy?" He asked ruffling his hair. Gabriel's expression darkened.

"Have you told him, Cas?"

Cas whimpered. "No..."

"Guy's, what happened..?" Adam asked, worry spreading over his face. Cas took hold of Gabriel's hand, they both began to whimper.

Adam turned to me. "Dean..?"

I took a breath and told him what had happened.

"I'm so sorry, Adam." My voice was thick with emotion. "Dad didn't make it."


	5. Chapter 5

Just like the rest of us when we learnt that dad had died. Adam didn't cry, he just got that same look in his eyes that Sam did. It was painful to see them both act so alike. Over the course of the next few weeks, things were quiet-except for Gabriel crashing into stuff everytime he came to check on us. There weren't any attacks or anything weird, that gave me time to actually think over everything that happened, I secretly hoped that Sam would go through his grieving process so that I could go through mine without having to worry about him. Is it bad that I was waiting for him to crack? I thought about the argument my parents had that night.

'_How do you expect them to protect themselves, John? By ignoring reality and running away? You were selfish for doing what you did. You should've left me.'_

What did she mean by that? I spent whole nights racking my brains trying to figure out what dad had done to endanger us, what was selfish of him? Why was Crowley in a box? What did he mean by '_thank you for releasing the king of hell.'_? Why did those things attack soon as he left..? I didn't have any of the answers but I had a nagging feeling that it was my fault, did my curiosity cause a chain reaction? Deep in my thoughts, I didn't notice Adam had sat down next to me.

"You're not the only one who thinks this is all bullshit you know."

"Who said I thought any of this was bullshit?" I asked. In all honesty I didn't even know what was even real anymore. My best friend is an angel, my other only friend is also an angel and my baby brother was on the road to becoming a sociopath.

Adam raised an eyebrow. "Fine, you got me." I said. "I think everything's gone to shit and I can't do anything about it. I hate not being in control of what my life revolves around, dammit Adam why do you insist on having these conversations?"

Adam laughed as I realized he hadn't actually said anything, I kind of just spilled everything out without knowing it, he had a kind of soft charisma that tugs at you. Definitely not a Winchester trait.

"I bet that felt so bad." Adam chuckled.

"Yeah...Apparently it's supposed to make you feel better." I said in a mock matter-of-factly tone. "Bullshit." He said through another chuckle. He opened a couple of beer cans and passed one to me. Ironic really. My first beer was shared with my older brother in front of the fireplace with rain tapping on the window talking about life, just another thing out of a movie. We sat there in silence opening beer can after beer can-I guess we had genetic immunity to alcohol or something.

"Are you scared, Dean?" He asked, breaking the silence.

"Funny enough, no." I replied. I wasn't afraid at the time, it was like everything had prepared me to deal with what had happened up to that point. Adam turned to look at me.

"I wasn't either."

"But...Now?" I asked cautiously.

"I'm petrified." His expression was stony and hard, it was difficult to look at. "My mum was all I had, she died five years ago. Dad didn't even know."

"I'm sorry, man."

Adam patted my shoulder and got up. "I'm gonna get some shut eye, you should too."

I went to check on Sam and Cas, they found a telescope and had been camping out in the attic for a few days, Cas was trying so hard for him, he taught him about planets and constellations. I really appreciated it.

I decided to go for a walk, I mean, what's the worst that can happen? It was a nice night, the sky was clear and you could actually see the stars. The last time I was out this late was on Halloween, I was supposed to take Sammy trick-or-treating but I took him to a field like this one and we set off fireworks instead. I got in trouble for bringing him home late, but the smile on Sammy's face was worth it. I walked until the house was just a dot in the distance, I layed down on the soft grass and just as I was about to fall asleep, someone spoke.

"We have a problem." Said a husky voice. I jumped up and looked in the direction of the voice.

"Are you an ang-"

He cut me off. "Yes hello I'm an angel, the name's Raphael and you've made a huge mess of things, Dean Winchester."

"What? How do you know my na-"

Raphael cut me off again. "I am an archangel, it's my job to keep updated. While I'd _love_ to stay and chat with the idiot who released the king of hell, I have matters regarding your recklessness to deal with, unfortunately we require your assistance so I'm not allowed to kill you yet." He sighed.

I was instantly on my guard. "Why would you want to kill me?"

"That's a tale for another time, until then you are going to help imprisoning the king of hell again."

"Who says I am going to help you?" I asked defensively.

"I do. You effectively killed off your own father, maybe his spawn possesses the same hunting skills he did."

At this point I was ready to punch the fucker. "I didn't kill my dad, those demons did." I said clenching my fists.

"Oh silly you." He chuckled. "Of course _you _wouldn't know about the deal he made. The only reason he was alive up until his death was because Crowley was imprisoned, then you done what you did and well, John isn't _exactly _living it up in heaven."

"What do you mean by 'he's not exactly living it up in heaven'?" I asked twitching with rage.

Raphael leaned in, close to my face. "Because he's not there." He whispered with a shit eating grin. How was it possible to have angels like Cas and Gabe, yet still have douches like Raphael. I was starting to dislike him more than I did the demons.

I sprinted back to the house, but tiptoed through the door. I figured the best thing to do was wake up Cas and tell him what happened, I told him what Raphael had said. He didn't look surprised.

"Cas..?" I asked tentatively. "Did you already know?"

Cas developed a sudden interest in his shoes. "I did. I knew about your father's deal with the demon." His voice became small and he looked like he was going to cry again. "But I'm not sorry for not telling you." He pouted. "We didn't want you to know until we figured out the whole story...I am sorry it happened, Dean." He looked up with tears in his eyes. I was still taken aback at his sudden sassiness, I raised an eyebrow.

"Who's we?"

"Just me and Gabriel." He beamed. "We've been on this case by ourselves!" He remarked proudly, but then his expression darkened. "Raphael isn't a nice angel, working with him won't be easy, he'll probably want to get rid of your when we're done."

"Something tells me we won't be working with him." I said.

Cas looked at me. "We'll be working _for _him."


End file.
